Getting out of "the box"...by Kathy

Yesterday I had some events in the morning put me in a non-sgbd state (you just don't hear them when you're angry or frustrated...).  I was trying to get out of it because I was in a great meeting, hearing really good speakers.  The sgbd thought that kept returning was simply "Choose to forgive."  I'm also trying to recognize when I'm "in the box" (read Anatomy of Peace for that one) and I knew I was in the "I deserve box" which, put simply, is when we think things should go our way.  I deserve kids that listen and obey.  I deserve some time to myself.  I deserve a house that is clean.  So it took considerable concentration and a lot of self analysis...always a party...but I emerged eventually and then noticed that all day long the sgbd's were coming left and right.  In that meeting I had a sgbd that I should talk during our mentoring meetings about a path for my son to consider, he said that had been on his mind a lot lately!  A lot of the sgbd's had to do with helping my kids with their jobs or spending more time with them.  My 18 y.o. son is an amazing help around the house, extremely capable and works cheerfully.  It's so easy to know that he will handle things and just ignore him.  I had a sgbd to work with him on the dishes last night.  A good conversation happened because of that one.   Normally my husband reads to the little ones, I had a sgbd to do that myself.  I thoroughly enjoyed the time with them.  Both of thoses last ones meant giving up time to do my own thing (including writing this post which I had a sgbd NOT to do because it would have kept my husband awake) and it helped me to stay out of the "I deserve" box by looking for opportunities to serve and show love to my family instead of getting things done or doing something on my list (which quite honestly is mostly made up of things I want to study or write...)  Had another more difficult one, mostly because a sick sinking feeling had to be endured before I had an opportunity to act upon it, to correct a communication that didn't come out as I intended.